Subtitle (115)
0:00Whenever somebody turns a failure into success,
0:04something really interesting has happened,
0:06and we should be asking ourselves how and why.
0:21We find it really hard to separate the idea that,
0:25“yeah, I made a mistake, I failed, I did something wrong”,
0:28with the idea that, “I am a failure”.
0:32There's no way that people can learn without failing.
0:35Think of some of the heroes of our day,
0:37they've made enormous number of mistakes.
0:39It's through failure, that we can enjoy deep learning,
0:43become more resilient and stronger.
0:46And if you look at the life of any successful person,
0:50they've always had major, as well as minor failures.
0:58I don't like failure. I think it sucks.
1:01It's a terrible thing. I wish it wasn't necessary,
1:03but I can't figure out any other way for people to learn
1:06how to do most things, but to sort of screw up enough
1:09until the point where they get better at it.
1:11When I think about failure,
1:12there's three general sorts of responses that emerge
1:14from both the management, literature in practice.
1:17The first one is what I call “the forgive and forget” approach.
1:21And the problem with “forgive and forget”
1:23is there's like no accountability and there's no learning.
1:26The second approach is what I call the “Silicon Valley standard”.
1:29This is remember, blame, stigmatize, ostracize and humiliate.
1:34And the problem with that is that when you sort of humiliate people
1:38or put them down when they fail,
1:39then they're afraid to admit mistakes,
1:41and the whole world turns into a cover your ass sort of game,
1:44so no learning occurs.
1:46And the way that the most effective organizations, and in fact,
1:49if you look at research on hospitals that learn from medical mistakes,
1:52this is sort of the mantra they sometimes use.
1:55It's to “forgive and remember”.
1:57So you forgive to have some psychological safety.
2:00And you remember so that you can learn from your own mistakes
2:03and other people's mistakes.
2:08Anyone has the right to fail.
2:11I experience my downs.
2:12I experience hardships and difficulties just like anyone else does.
2:16And what positive psychology does,
2:18is give one tools to overcome this.
2:20Positive psychology essentially focuses on what works.
2:24When we focus on people’s strengths,
2:27when we cultivate their happiness,
2:29we're actually indirectly also helping them deal
2:32with hardships and difficulties.
2:35The first thing that an organization needs to do
2:39is to give space for people to fail.
2:43It needs to identify the areas where failure is not traumatic or terrible.
2:48To also consider giving people recovery space.
2:52And this is necessary. That's part of creativity.
2:55It’s no coincidence that the word “creation” and “recreation”
2:59are etymologically linked.
3:01Because we need to recreate if we want to create.
3:05These recovery periods in the long term
3:08actually contribute to creativity, productivity, as well as happiness.
3:16All of us are at risk of cognitive dissonance in a small way
3:20whenever we make a mistake.
3:22Particularly a mistake on something that's important to us.
3:25When we've invested our reputation, when we put money into it,
3:28when we put time into it,
3:30that is when we are most at risk
3:32because our self-image is under threat.
3:34We find it really hard to separate the idea that,
3:38“yeah, I made a mistake, I failed, I did something wrong”,
3:41with the idea that, “I am a failure”.
3:44“I am the kind of person who makes mistakes,
3:47who gets things wrong”.
3:49The first step in responding in a constructive way
3:52when you've made a mistake is to separate yourself from the mistake.
3:57To understand, you can be a person who made a mistake.
4:00That does not make you a person who will always make mistakes.
4:04Then you'll be able to admit you got something wrong
4:07and start to, in a mature and forward thinking way,
4:10think about how to fix it.
4:12Since failure is around every corner, we're always making mistakes,
4:16if we try to do something interesting,
4:17we're going to be making mistakes.
4:19So whenever you're trying a new experiment,
4:21whether it's a new job, a new product, a new hobby,
4:24a new boyfriend or girlfriend, whatever it is,
4:27you need to give some thought to what you're going to do
4:30if it doesn't work out, and how to minimize the downside,
4:33as well as taking advantage of the upside.
4:36The next thing is to have some sort of feedback mechanism
4:40that tells you whether things are going well, or not going well.
4:43Tells you whether you're succeeding or failing.
4:46Often it's simply a case of asking yourself
4:49what the markers for success might be.
4:52Or even simpler than that,
4:53just asking someone you can trust, to give you a straight opinion.
4:58It can be remarkably hard to get people to give you an honest
5:01and constructive opinion, but that's absolutely essential.
5:05You may not always get responses,
5:06but that's the kind of feedback that you need
5:09if you're going to fix your own mistakes.
5:17Thomas Edison has patented 1,093 inventions,
5:23more than any other scientist inventor in history.
5:27He's also the scientist as far as we know,
5:29who has failed the most times.
5:32When Edison was working on the battery,
5:33an interviewer came over and said to him,
5:37“Edison, you have failed a thousand times. Give it up.”
5:40To which Edison responded,
5:42“I haven't failed a thousand times.
5:44I've succeeded a thousand times.
5:46I've succeeded in showing what doesn't work.”
5:49Edison also famously said, “I failed my way to success.”
5:55One of the mantras that I repeat over and over again
5:57to myself, to my students is,
6:00“learn to fail or fail to learn.”
6:03I tell them that I wish them that they fail more.
6:07And I truly, sincerely mean it.