Subtitles (31)
0:01If I may, there's something
I need to get off my chest.
0:04So, I did a small favor
for a neighbor recently,
0:07and they, as a token of thanks,
gifted me a candle.
0:12Like I'm a medieval peasant.
0:15Whatever.
Anyway, I went on with my day.
0:17All I had on my schedule
was a walk through the mall.
0:19Yeah, the mall.
I go for walks in the mall.
0:24Anyway, I'm passing
by one of those candle kiosks.
0:27The smell of it hit me so hard
0:29I forgot
the name of my daughter.
0:30My own daughter!
[ Laughter ]
0:32The nasty potpourri scent,
it just lingered with me.
0:35It's not good.
So, my mall walk was ruined.
0:38Went home,
came through my front door,
0:39and what do I see
there in the living room?
0:41My wife had lit
a candle in the kitchen.
0:46And I'm sorry,
but I just have to say this.
0:48The candle era ends now.
2:06[ Children laughing ]
2:09[ Cheers and applause ]
7:16[ Cheers and applause ]
7:32And you candles
can take your fire
7:34right back down to hell
because -- ya burnt!
7:36Whew!
[ Cheers and applause ]
7:38That felt good
to get off my chest.
7:40We'll be right back
with Stephen Colbert.
